October is Domestic Violence Awareness MonthHere is some information provided by the Men's Health Network to raise the public's awareness of the danger men and children face when living with a violent spouse or mother.
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month
Join With Us to End the Vicious Cycle of Domestic Violence and Child Abuse
One man battered every 14 seconds!
Special Report: No place to run for male victims of domestic abuse: Shelters, support groups rare for men whose mates batter them at home, A Detroit News report by Becky Beaupre. Also related stories: Spotlight on Female Abuser: For 13 years, he never hit her back and Special Report: Battered men take problems to Internet
Domestic violence is a confusing and disturbing phenomena, but it is not gender specific as many would have us believe. In what has been called a "dance of mutual destructiveness"(1), mainstream research indicates that men and women abuse each other with almost equal frequency. The same study which found that a woman is abused by her spouse every 15 seconds, also found that a man is abused by his spouse every 14 seconds.(2)
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month but we cannot hope to end domestic violence until we understand the cycle of violence. Children who see their fathers or mothers abused are more likely to become abusers as adults; children who are abused by a parent are at greater risk of becoming abusers as adults; and more children are abused by their mothers than by their fathers.
She hits, he hurts: Women batter men , by Kathleen Parker
If a man asked for help, who would listen?
Since society does not define abuse of men by women as a problem, official police data reflects a much more frequent response to abuse of women by men than of men by women. Therefore, it is not surprising to find over 90% of the calls to police or to hotlines coming from women, not men.(8) But, if a man called, who would listen?
Working with Violent Women, by Erin Pizzey
The solution is simple -- we must learn to be effective parents and spouses without resorting to violence to resolve disputes with our loved ones.
Most importantly, we as a society must begin to acknowledge that women are no less than equal partners in the cycle of violence. Until we develop programs to treat violent women, we not never hope to end the vicious cycle of domestic violence, nor can we hope to end the terrible tragedy of child abuse.
We ask that you join with us to end the vicious cycle of violence that afflicts our families and our society.
For more information about domestic violence, contact:
Men's Health Network
P. O. Box 770
Washington, D.C. 20044-0770
1) "Women Are Responsible Too", Judith Shervin, Ph.D. and Jim Sniechowski, Ph.D., Los Angeles Times. June 21, 1994.
2) Research by M. Strauss & R. Gelles as reported in "Women Are Responsible Too", Judith Shervin, Ph.D. & Jim Sniechowski, Ph.D., Los Angeles Times. June 21, 1994.
4) Data provided by the Child Protective Service agencies of Virginia (67% mothers, 33% fathers), New Jersey (70% mothers, 30% fathers), Texas (68% mothers, 32% fathers), and Minnesota (62% mothers, 38% fathers) , and Alaska (67% mothers, 33% fathers).
5) Bureau of Justice, "Murder in Families", NCJ-143498.
7) A study of child abuse in Lansing, Michigan. Joan Ditson and Sharon Shay in Child Abuse and Neglect, Volume 8. 1984.
8) "Spouse Abuse: A Two-way Street", Warren Farrell, Ph.D., USA Today. June 29, 1994.
This information from the Men's Health Network was provided by the Men's HOTLINE.
John Lee on Anger: An Interview, by Bert H. Hoff.
Facing the Fire, a review of the book Facing the Fire: Experiencing and Expressing Anger Appropriately.
A lot of anger is directed at ex-wives, especially just after the break-up of a marriage. You might also want to check out our section Men, Love and Betrayal, which explores dealing with the grief, anger and loneliness at breakup, and whether it's possible to trust and love again.
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